May 10, 2010

May is National Masturbation Month

Let's talk orgasms.

February 14, 1999, at approximately 10:00 pm, I experienced my very first toe-curling, leg-jellying, vision-clouding orgasm and now they're as necessary for me as coffee in the morning. The specifics of that night will be as indelible as my college graduation, the day I learned to skip, the day I got my driver's license. It's that vivid.

Recently released from a disaster of a relationship, I decided to satisfy my curiosity once and for all. Had I orgasmed before? I thought I had, but it wasn't earth-shaking like Johanna Lindsey (of romance story fame) described in her smutty books. People always said, "if you have one, you'll KNOW!", but I found that people often exaggerate their sexual exploits.

So, on Valentine's Day, alone and happy to be so, I hopped down to our local sex shop, paid my dollar entry fee and described to the worker what I needed, while trying without success to keep my blushing at bay. I needed knowledge! I needed experience! I needed to CUM! Hard!

So he led me to the wall. The wall of pleasureable toys and assorted naughtiness. The cum wall. And after discussing the virtues of one over the other, I made my decision: a small, white, battery-operated vibrator that had a whole lot of power. I could hardly wait to get home.

Comfortable in my bed with a movie playing softly on my TV ("Run Lola run" will always hold a special place in my heart), I twisted the head of my new companion and tentatively let him vibrate against my clit. I would get close, and then back it away, trying to savor the pleasure in the "just before", and then work it some more. It took less than 10 minutes to understand the mystery of the elusive O.

It rocked me. It shocked me. I gasped and clutched my comforter and, in a voice I did not recognize as my own, moaned and swore like I never had before with my partners. I learned the various angles, the right pressure, the balance between greed and self-control.

I went through 6 batteries that first night. The next day I bought a value pack.

Since then, I wouldn't say that I'm a masturbation addict; I much prefer the presence of a cock and some fingers...and a tongue, perhaps combined with a dildo. (Okay, so I'm an ORGASM addict.) More importantly, I know when I'm close. I know how to get there and I can even provide directions.

Hooray for masturbation!


  1. Great post... masturbation is good. :)

  2. I know, right? I don't even want to imagine a world without it. ;)

  3. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  4. The best masturbation trick is to ride the corner of a table or chair or bedpost. Bent over, bottom exposed, clit pressured, breath held, bodyweight used as leverage, until the waves wash over you and you shudder a release.

  5. Fantastic post. The female sexual appetite is an astonishing thing once awakened. I think there's an inner lioness in every woman, just waiting to claw free.

  6. There is always room for fingers and toes and tongues and cocks and of course the faithful clone a willy


Leave your mark.